First of all, I was on post limit yesterday my main account (deepthroating-sehun) and I have a request, please check this post.

On more personal “news” I started babysitting a little girl this monday. Well, first of all, I went on a “Play-Date” LOL with two kids on sunday and it was the very first time I interacted with young children… I was so damn nervous it took me like 1 hour to get used to them and to even say something because I’m really shy, YES I’M EVEN SHY WITH YOUNGER CHILDREN, DON’T JUDGE ME. Anyhow, we ended up becoming BFF after a couple of hours xDD the little girl (she’s 4) even sat on my lap! It was hard to “control” (i can’t find the word right now lol sorry) some of their actions sometimes like, “let’s stop throwing rocks at each other and let’s play” LOL but it was overall good. Pretty good for a first time actually.

Then, the next day (this monday) they brought home another girl so i could babysit her and I was really excited…. BUT SHE’S SOOOOO BORING!! She’s 4 and well, first of all, I’m not used to little girls. I’m used to boys because I grew up surrounded by boys. My only two cousins are boys and my far relatives are male as well. During elementary school I had more guy-friends than girl-friends and even now my closest friends are two guys. So yeah, long story short: I’m not used to girls. Either way, I started with an open mind, like “we’ll have fun and I’ll become the ultimate Super-Nanny” but I swear to god, this girl is boring as fuck. All she wants to do is colour on a sheet of paper and watch tv, when she gets tired she prefers watching online videos of the same tv show she was watching on TV earlier, when she gets tired of those, she prefers playing online games of the exact same character of the exact same tv show, and when she gets bored, she goes back to watching TV again! Gosh, I even told her, “Yo, let’s play tag/treasure-hunting/hide and seek/any other physical game that’s more fun” but she only gives me a weird look and wants to watch the same fucking tv show not only on the TV but also in the computer. I literally almost fell asleep the 2nd day I got to babysit her. Today she didn’t came but I’m thankful. Babysitting is a lot more tiring than what I thought, and that’s all because of my efforts of making this girl more active because everything she does/makes me do is boring as fuck. Also because I screamed for 120 minutes while watching EXO perform LOL but anyhow you get me. This is making me feel really stressed because every day is a fucking routine with this girl and we can’t even go outside to play because her parents are overprotective. Ugh… I was expecting this to be cooler tbh, or well, with the first 2 children I played on sunday I had a shitload of fun, so it’s probably just this little girl.

Anyhow, I have over 10 followers in this blog which is a very pleasant surprise because since this is a “personal” blog I never expected to get followers at all, LOL so PLEASE GIVE ME SOME ADVICE? LIKE SERIOUSLY, PLEASE I’M BEGGING YOU, GIVE ME ADVICES! I’M GOING CRAZY!! My askbox in this blog is open and I also enabled answers on this post because I’m desperate!! 

Well, in a different topic, lately my mom’s being weird. She keeps wanting to watch and listen to my music/kpop groups with me a lot nowadays… I think that’s because she’s starting to realize that I’ll move out soon and all the things she was supposed to with me and regrets not doing before will make a difference lol I mean, that’s cool but it feels weird. Yesterday we watched EXO’s MV’s and my mom got enchanted by Junmyeon. Lol no joke, she saw him in MAMA and went like, “wow, he’s really handsome.” Then we watched History and she was like, “WHOAAA SO HANDSOME SDJHDOAJSDHFHLKSDFK” lol and it doesn’t help that he’s my 3-4rd bias along with the rest of exo LOLOL  today we watched DBSK my gods and she really liked Jaejoong, well she always did lol and Minnie <3 and then in SHINee she likes Kibum the most xD yay my 2nd bias in SHINee LOL I only have to show her u-kiss now so she can give me her approval, hopefully on my Kevin, Kibum or Kiseop LOL if not, then my Jaeseop is okay too LOL 

Also I’m on my period and I feel really down. I don’t want to see anybody and I don’t want anyone to see me, I want to stay home all week and cry. I’m just… I don’t feel good at all.

I also have to write some shonen story and I have nothing on mind. I have like a very shojo-angsty style and even tho shonen is my favourite manga genre, I think I’m more used to reading it than writing it lol please wish me luck I really need to come up with something ><

I have a lot of shit to watch and read but I’m here procrastinating.

And on my transition to raw-vegan, it’s going pretty well, I only eat 60g of meat/animal products a day, the rest is wheat or full grains and veggies/fruits. I don’t seem to find any good recipes tho… and the ones I find I’m becoming lazy to make them kjszdfhskjdzf I need to get a grip.

Also I need to start liking myself more because I really feel super displeased with my appearance in general. I wish someone could help me but people just read this and that’s all. No comments, not even a hello lol but I guess I’m pleased with that. I’m glad that people reads my logs. Also, I have 955 subs in youtube now :) i’m so happy and thankful.

I really want to be the best at everything but I don’t make an effort to achieve it.

That’s going to change from now on.

OMG AND TODAY I DIED WITH EXO’S PERFORMANCE!! I’M SO PROUD OF THEM REALLY :’) I SCREAMED SO MUCH MY THROAT KINDA HURTS NOW LOL Ahhh and OMG I’m just so happy!! They make me so happy, really :’)

I’ll start recommending songs from now on, and hopefully you’ll listen to them if you want xD

Today’s recommendation is 7th Trigger by Uverworld.

And I need to make a new cover before I die…. I haven’t sang in like a fucking week so probably that’s why i’m losing my mind-balance LOL this is a small fragment from my most “recent” cover… i may make a full korean cover soon. Also, idk why “some” bitch got promoted all of a sudden like wtf bro there’s better singers in youtube tbqh, I say this because we roll in the same circles LMAO 

And please give me an advice regarding the first matter I posted?